How Mommy Uses iPhone

I have been constantly amazed by iPhone. It really has a little brain of its own. A tribute to late Steve Jobs.

Especially in Singapore, almost everyone I know owned, is owning, or plans to own an iPhone. Quite phenomenal.

I've plan to write this post ever since I got my own. Approximately a year ago. Initially, I thought, it was the thrill of new gadgets. Now, a year on, I'm still very attached to the little tool.

1. I used it to track library due dates. Singapore NLB has its own apps, and being able to go online anytime anywhere has helped me a lot in avoiding overdue fines (imagine, being able to bring the list and finding the items at the same time :D)

2. I actually took photos of everything that I need instead of taking notes. My photo album consists of -on top of myriads of children photos- recipes, dictation list, important school announcement, enrichment courses calendars, answers to workbooks (so that I don't have to flip to and fro), ...

3. Entertainment on the go. Practically anywhere, the kids can play games and watch movies. Grrreat for waiting time.

4. Teaching tools. Some great apps teaches phonics, maths, Chinese, ... One of most often apps that I used as reference is the Pleco Chinese-English dictionary and Hanyu Pinyin chart.

5. 'Info-desk' at our fingertips. Combo with Lord Google, I can search anything under the sky. Example question from my 6 years old: why is there so much water on earth?

So, thank you, Mr. Jobs. You have touched so many lives.

Encouragement for All Mothers

My own beloved mother is a working mom. She still is :)
So I gather that I know what it takes, what it will be like, to raise kids while working full time. Now, with two little fellas, I can see from both point of views, mother's and child's.


Long ago, an idealist me would have probably answered with full-head-on determination that I want to be a stay at home Mom.


Upon Kid no 1, all my beloveds (husband, mother, father, ...) convinced me that I should still keep working. At that time, anyway, I still had my tuition fee loan to pay, house to find, ..., all those things that scream money.


And now, six years on, am still in the same office, and amazingly I cannot say that I didn't have a blast there. I do enjoy the brain stimulation, adrenaline rush in meeting deadline, and the teamwork.


One opinion that I am still holding tight is that working mother spends quality time with her kids. By holding tight, yours truly means trying-to-shoo-away-my-guilt-by-providing-quality-time-with-my-kids.


However, I do still think that parents are still the best caregiver and best coach. So whenever my kids misbehave, a little voice within me is still whispering, will this happen if I stay at home?


Above two are one plus and one not-so-plus aspects of many more dilemma of a working mother, I believe.


And then... *gets exciting* one day, I stumbled upon this (when I was searching for working mother's beneficial office arrangement for my boss, bless him):


http://motheringtimes.blogspot.com/2011/03/how-long-have-i-been-sahm.html


It is nicely, aptly, and kindly put. A really recommended reading for all mothers.


I have made peace with our 'condition'. And with acceptance comes amicable arrangement. I am still working. But whenever my kids need me, I will be there for them. Can't say it's easy, but hey, all mothers are superheroes, right? You guys too, Daddies...


So today, I am taking a day off to PLAY with them (one of our family tradition, we'll take a day off every school holiday :)). We'll probably catch a movie, go to view all the good works they've done to Bishan park, visit the library... so much goodies to do in a day! Yay!

[Through the Eyes of A Child] Can I get the roses without the thorns?

Teachable moments came everywhere, anywhere...

I wished I seized it.

But no... I've missed it.

However... it was indeed still an enlightenment, for me.

We were choosing flowers, and my daughter was desperate. She wanted to choose the roses, but was pricked by the thorns. Hence the question, "Can I get the roses without the thorns?"

I did explain to her that roses and thorns come as a package. It's so beautiful until it needs the thorns to protect it. That's it. I didn't go deep.

Instead, it left me pondering.

Life recently was not so well... Problem at work... stress at home in catching up with all the lessons.
So this is sort of a nice reminder... when we expect rosy moments, we should also embrace the thorny ones. Since roses and thorns are a package deal.

How Can I Tell Her About It???

A few days ago, I received a phone call while working. It's from our kindergarten teacher.

I held my breath as she announced the audition result through phone. Our daughter was not selected. :(

At the same moment, images of her eyes shining while practicing flashed through. You see... our little girl loves to perform. She wanted this part. She knew the text by heart, has been practicing even without me.

Afterwards, I dialed my hubby. Wailing over the phone, I lamented to him... Oh no... how can I tell her? I told him that part of me was upset too... How can they not wanting my baby??? My ultra-reasonable other half reminded me that we're dealing with other parents' 'babies' too, here.

In the evening, upon reaching home, hubby quickly asked me, "How? Have you told her?". With a shrug I shook my head.

I waited for THE perfect moment, and soon it was bedtime. Inside my heart... there's a tiny but brilliant idea, a wish that perhaps, she'll even forget about it. In that way, perhaps, I won't need to let her down.

However, again, my great voice of reason throw another scenario... How if she heard it from her friends... That'll be even more fatal.

So I put her in my lap, and told her that her teacher called me. Immediately she stiffened. Not dilly-dallying, I told her that they've selected the other kid. As expected, tears welled up. As I hugged her and rubbed her back, I mouthed to hubby, "You see... you see...?"

We sooth her that it's not because she's bad... Simply because the other kid is better than her. It's okay to fail, because at least she has tried, gave it her best shot. And finally, she brightened up a tad hearing that there'll be plenty opportunity in primary school.

Drifting off to sleep, I smiled at the thought. Today, my daughter has learned to fail. Quite gracefully, I'd like to think. A vital life lesson well learned.

As for me, I learned that there will be no perfect moment to deliver upsetting news. It simply has to be done.

[Through the eyes of a child] If you put your mind into it, you can do anything you want

Recently, my six-year-old daughter told me while being coaxed to practice more, "I know... if you put your mind into it, you can do anything... "

Startled by this sudden surge of wisdom, I was quick to reply back, wide eyed and all... "Where did you learn that?"

And guess... her answer both surprised and soothed me at the same time.

"From the TV"

Well well well...

I remembered struggling to decide when she was a newborn whether we can let her watch TV. That's after extensive research that mostly uncover the evil side of the magic box.

Finally, I myself was lured into the temptation of adorable characters (anyway... hubby and I watched Hi-5 during our exam study in university... happily commenting all through about the comical aspect of the bunch. I wonder whether it's karma that bring our firstborn into loving the Nathan-Kathleen-Kellie-Charli-Tim combo so much in the first 18 months of her life).

So for us, TV is OK, as long as it comes from DVD/VCD. I am still a scared of all the commercials presented.

But slowly the kids found their way to Okto, a children channel in Singapore. Thankfully that happened after they are fully assured that no, they cannot behave like ones in commercials. And equally no, being on TV does not mean the toys or food can materialize at home. Whining or not.

So there... after the journey, glad to hear that children, too, get little nuggets of life wisdom from TV. :)

Great Expectation

Recently, when office was hectic and erratic (still is, until now) an home is equally demanding, I remembered my email to a best friend many years ago. In case it can also sooth others in similar situation, here it is:

---quote---

We're surrounded by others' expectation. Most often, our loved ones are the highest of them all. I think, this is because they have our best interest in hearts. As much as we would like to meet all of them, reaching a serene equilibrium is a tricky business.
Because... somehow meeting one's expectation means sacrificing other's. True?

And indeed expectation is a cruel thing. Sometimes we expect other illogically.
Especially our loved ones. To us, they are the greatest, close to superhero.
Among the loved ones, I think the kids has the biggest expectation from parents.
To any parents, their kids are their gods, capable of all sort of thing.

So there... One's life is started with expectation. When we were born, we're expected to scream our head off. Otherwise our devoted mommy will be worried. As we grow up, the expectation grows bigger as well. From teachers, friends, colleagues, neighbors, bosses, spouse, kids... It's not substitute, it's summation.

I guess... from our experience... this kind of thingy happen to anyone.

As closing, I have made peace with myself. I think, realizing a little bit too late, the greatest burden is my own expectation.
My fear of failure cause this all. I always tried to please everyone, such that putting myself in the unpleasant situation. I was too afraid of upsetting others.

After that acceptance, I felt better.

How about you?

Most importantly, please do remind me if I expect too much from my kids. And that we must not forget of His expectation. To walk on His path. Therefore, my dearest friend, no worry.
He'll make everything beautiful in His own time. Just walk on His, together with Him. :)

[It Works] Letterland

Long time ago, I was a little skeptical about Letterland. I thought of it as just another one of hyped-up-commercially-exploited creation.

However, we've been converted now.

[+]
1. Catchy tunes. My 3 years old son has been humming the tunes for a few months now.
2. Fun fun fun stories. Even my daughter cannot stop reading the book.
3. Bright beautiful colorful characters, both in illustration and in their story roles.
4. Well developed method of phonics introduction, making it easier for children to remember. 5. We did zoo-phonics with our first one, and we're impressed by the more wholesome approach. From single sound introduction, to digraphs, to more as we've yet to explore.
6. Letterland has almost everything we can think of. Games, workbook, storybook, flashcards,... To make learning continuous and fun.
7. They are available everywhere, not exclusive from the school.

[-]
1. Limited range of product in Singapore.
2. They don't provide free online games as other brands do nowadays.
3. Some stuffs are literally breathtakingly expensive.

Another one is minus for me, plus for my son. He can't stop doing the workbook. So one book was finished up pretty quickly. :)